cycling!

Today went East Coast with Chew Ping, ChengChin, Hui Yi, Hong Xian, Christoher and Joel...
hahas...
had fun lahhx...
everyone wasn't realli late today...
meet at 10.30 but think 10.45 then everyone reach...
then took MRT to AMK then sit bus 135 to near east coast there the walk underpass and into east coast...
hahas...
lost out way in eat coast...
took us about 2hr to see any rental shop...
thanks to my leading again...
as aways...
xD

iie lead them to a dead end...
hahas...
so we walk all the way back n everyone almost died...
had abit of mam mam then we head to the second rental shop...
rent 1hr + 1hr free + one free drink...
yay~
iie paid for joel and miie...
and got our bicycle...

ride for three hours...
first hour already got alot problem....
ChengChin hurt her leggy or smth...
then Chirst volmit...
HongXian muscle cramp...
then Hui Yi felt left out...
then the next hour issh joel hand muscle pain...
lolx...
so many problem dehhx...
lolx...
but oh well...
had a fun day...

then after bicycle, went to play sandy...
lolx...
iie think only ChengChin know wad iie write on the sand to let the water wash away...
hahas...
she got take photo of it...
lolx...
took alot of photo tgt today...
lolx...
but only with gals lahhx...
boys nt included...
xD

very tired lahhx today...
see miie blog aready can see...
so sui sui biian biian dehhx blog...
lolx...

after that took bus back AMK then took MRT back Yishun...
the bus trip back to AMK darn long lahhx...
everyone tired liiao...
ChengChin took photo of Christ n Joel slping tgt...
hahas...
so like couple...
xD

then CP quarrel with her sis due to a small thing of forgetfulness niia...
sad for her...
aiis...
she cried....
><
aiis...
oh well...

then had dinner at NP food court...
ate porridge...
then send the gals off at the bus interchange...
then the guys send miie back home...
then they went back to the bus interchange to get home...
went out at 7.45am in the morning...
came home around 9pm plus...
hahas...

and plus...
since last night, i'm sick...
hahas....
flu + throat pain...
now flu worsen, throat better, and got cough + asthma...
hw nice...
lolx...
sick already....
yay...
hahas...
iie hate getting sick...
aiis...
wish someone can be there taking care of miie...
xD
but oh well...
i'm kinda used to getting through it alone liiaos...
lolx... must learn independent euu know!?!?!?!?
xD

if got the photos from ChengChin liiaos then iie post up bahhx...
tt's all for today...

gya na!


._LaLaWorld_.

LaLa

elloz...
haben been available these few days....
been working hard but aren't earning at all...
wad bullshit...
hahas...

went door to door everyday to sell the cards...
but nt much ppl buy from us...
sad...
joel got tired of it and so we end up gibing them back the left overs...
sad...
now no job...
joel happy lor...
got job liiaos...
hiis bro's fren dehhx company or smth...
do a job like a subber lyk tt...
one day $80...
but tt job not everyday gt...
but so good lahhx....
sad, hiis mom dun wan us do tgt..
so miie n panda are jobless...

tml going to meet Chew Ping, Cheng Chin and Hui Yi go east coast play play...
long time never see Chew Ping and Cheng Chin liiaos...
lolx...
miss Cheng Chin dehhx craziness...
hahas...
joel, panda and chirst tagging along too...
hope we'll hab a fun day...
tml meeting panda and joel 8am in the morning as miie n panda need to look fer a job...
will be looking through the news papers...
iie despo for money but cannot earn anything...
lolx...
hope tml iie won't be broke or smth...
hahas...

looking into hiis profile...
look at all the photos we had in the past in my folder...
those photos are wad used to keep miie going sometime when iie felt like ending all up...
for some reason....
i kinda regretted....
in some way...
but in some way...
iie dun....
miss the attentions n the way he pamper miie...
the way he always tries to make miie happy and the way he alwasy look at miie...
and hiis cheerfulness n silliness...
yeap...
iie miss them...

but i'm living normally now...
no love no nth...
juz single...
and i'm kinda happy with where iie am now...
iie hab ppl that cares alot about miie and who iie love to be with...
even though they can be kinda bad sometimes...
but i'm kinda alright with it...
laughter are getting more and more than tears...
and i'm kinda loving it how things are now...

oh well...
am thinking alot of the past these few days...
miie n Wee dehhx happy pass...
wonder did iie made the correct choice or not...
but oh well...
i'm here now...
so there's no turning back...
wheather it's right or not, i'm still gonna walk through it...
that's the only way left..
hahas...

but still, those past is such a blessing...
but iie guess i've been hell lot of a devil for Wee bahhx....
hahas...
aiis...
oh well...

a song for everyone to enjoy!



EveryDay

[Troy]
Once in a lifetime
means there’s no second chance
so I believe than you and me
should grab it while we can

[Gabriella]
Make it last forever
and never give it back

[Troy]
It’s our turn, and I’m loving’ where we’re at

[Troy y Gabriella]
Because this moment’s really all we have

[Troy]
Everyday
of our lives,

[Gabriella]
wanna find you there, wanna hold on tight

[Troy]
Gonna run

[Troy y Gabriella]
While we’re young
and keep the faith

[Troy]
Everyday

[Troy y Gabriella]
From right now,
gonna use our voices and scream out loud

[Gabriella]
Take my hand;

[Troy]
together we
will celebrate,

[Gabriella]
celebrate.

[Troy y Gabriella]
Oh, ev’ryday.

[Gabriella]
They say that you should follow

[Troy]
and chase down what you dream,

[Gabriella]
but if you get lost and lose yourself

[Troy]
what does is really mean?

[Gabriella]
No matter where we’re going,

[Troy]
it starts from where we are.

[Gabriella, Troy y Gabriella]
There’s more to life when we listen to our hearts
[Troy y Gabriella]
and because of you, I’ve got the strength to start

Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Everyday
of our lives,
[Troy y Gabriella, Gabriella]
wanna find you there, wanna hold on tight
[Troy y Gabriella]
Gonna run
while we’re young
and keep the faith.

Everyday
[Troy]
from right now,
gonna use our voices and scream out loud
Take my hand;
together we
will celebrate,
[Gabriella]
Oh, ev’ryday

[Troy]
We’re taking it back,
we’re doing it here
together!

[Gabriella]
It’s better like that,
and stronger now
than ever!
[Troy y Gabriella]
We’re not gonna lose.
‘Cause we get to choose.
That’s how it’s gonna be!

[Troy]
Everyday
of our lives,
[Gabriella]
wanna find you there, wanna hold on tight.
[Troy]
Gonna run
while we’re young
[Troy y Gabriella]
And keep the faith
Keep the faith!

[Choir]
Everyday
of our lives,
wanna find you there, wanna hold on tight.
Gonna run
while we’re young
and keep the faith

Everyday
from right now,
gonna use our voices and scream out loud
Take my hand;
together we
will celebrate,

Ev’ryday!
Live ev’ry day!
Love ev’ryday!
Live ev’ryday!
Love ev’ryday!
Ev’ryday!
Ev’ryday!
Ev’ryday!
Ev’ryday!
Ev’ryday!
Ev’ryday!
Ev’ryday!

[Gabriella]
Ev’ryday!

._LaLaWorld_.
[[_Think No More_]]

gotta go my own way!

19 Nov 2oo7

went to meet Hui yi to find job...
actually meeting 9...
but iie over slp alittle...
so meet around 10.30am..
but hui yi also came late...
iie almost died there waiting fer her...
then went cheers buy news paper then go NP food court eat breadfast...
then look through the papers for jobs...
then some call liiao then reject miie due to my age...
so iie clever liiaos...
iie call n first thing ask if there's an age limit to the job they're offering...
so no nid they reject miie...
iie reject them arz! xD

found one sell Christmas card dehhx...
for every pack iie sell iie earn $4...
each pack got 8 pop up cards and is sold $10 each pack...
so miie n hui yii wanna take lurhhx...
and hor...
the person who answer the phone is a nice n wen rou voice dehhx jie jie...
hw nice...
iie dun mind habing tt kind of boss...
hahas...
therefore, took the job!

then later 1pm lyk tt hui yi n miie parted...
iie went to Panda house...
as he ytd said he would be bored n wanted to go joel's house tgt...
but in the end joel's too tired so he dun wan us go...
xD

so iie went there without telling hiimx...
then heng heng his dad coming out so iie tell them dun tell panda iie come...
then went in the com room n scard kor n hiimx...
nv knew kor was there...
hahas...
then kor kor went off at 2pm plus...
after that miie n Panda watch the doggy show...
nice nice..
hahas...
nt bad lahhx...

after that he went play Ps2...
iie see till iie fall aslp...
hahas...
6pm plus going 7plus then wake up...
hiis mummy bought dinner fer miie so iie ate it n ofcoz thank her...

then iie went home after that around 7pm plus going 8pm plus...
got home then chat a bit lyk tt then miie n panda quarrel again...
aiis...
misunderstanding or wad?...
aiis iie dunno...
was sad...
and wadever my last few phrase said, i'll do it...
iie said it, i'll do it...
humph!.. xD

wanna know the last few phrase?...

Miie: fine fine
iie make a bigger different alright
iie will gib up
happy?
iie won't bother euu much any more...
happy?
sure happy right...
kays
end of conversation kays

hahas...
crazy miie...
but iie mean it...
iie will stop...
iie won't even go think why u gave up half way...
it's ur chioce so iie won't stop euu...
and tt iie will full fill ur wish...
for juz being frens...
iie guess u never regretted nt steading with miie right?...
iie guess all the thing we went through a few months ago was fake right...
yeah...
it was nv meant to be true....
oh well...
yeah...

iie shall juz take euu as a fren...
a best fren maybe?...
who know...
iie will still care about ur feelings and stuff...
but iie can a sure euu...
my mind is set on th term, fren...
so BFF alright...
hahas...


20 Nov 2oo7

ytd comfirm with Panda n Joel weather they want the job too..
they're alright with it...
and last night miie n panda n joel talk about wad time meet up today...
so we meet up at 8.30am...
was suppose to meet up at 8am...
but iie was late...
hahas...
xD

then after that went yakun eat mam mam...
saw Poh Li n Kai Lin...
but they didn't saw us....
so nvm...
then later went Mac slack...
nth to do mahhx...
then saw Mr Shaiful...
said hi to hiimx then he was like "HEY, HI"
hahas...
then walk away....
then saw alot of other teacher also...
but iie dunno them...
so iie dun care...
then Panda n Joel said they habing teacher secret society meeting somewhere here...
hahas...
then later 9.30 went FunLand...
iie see Joel n Panda play them com there...
iie play Joel dunno wad thingy...
kinda hard...
coz iie direction fail...

then after that went to wait for Hui Yi outside OCBC bank...
it seems like forever...
hahas...
miie n joel keep playing while Panda stood at the pillar watching n talking...
hahas...
iie keep on kana bully...
well, as always~...
hahas...

then Hui Yi finally came...
yay...
finally...
iie was gonna die down there...
then we went off to time zone n play house of the dead 4....
nt iie play but Panda and Joel played...
hahas...
miie n Hui Yi stood there watching...
hahas

then later called Female BOSS if we could go down n take the cards already as she we ytd say at 1pm cans?..
she said can~...
but she suddenly say after 3pm then go can?...
then iie nv ask why and then agreed...
so we went joel's house n slack...
see Hui Yi kana bully by Joel then iie help out also...
but joel can take us two down sial...
he like no weakness lyk tt...
idiiot lahhx hiimx...
cheater...
xD

then later Panda join in after he had enough fun with the Guitar...
hahas...
then he n joel went bully hui yi as iie emo in a conner...
hahas...
why?...
iie dun tell euu why...
it's a secret....
hahas....
then later 1.30pm we set off to Serangoon...
hahas...
then iie lead the way...
but sadly, we keep on getting lost...
thanks miie...
in the end we gotta walk back n fourth again...
hahas...
so Joel lead us to the MANSION and Male BOSS gave us the thingy lurhhx...
we fill in out particulars and went off...
then later Panda help miie take my bag of card...
then joel played with hui yi's pastic bag as hui yi put all her cards in the bag...
hahas...

then after Joel n Panda Got off at khatib...
while miie n hui yi got off at yishun...
iie took all the packs home including their's...
iie almost died there...
so heavy...
hahas....
then went home, bath and then went out again...
go meet joel n panda..
watch them eat dinner...
while starving myself as mom got cook...
later go home can eat...
then went off to joel's house again...
on the way to his house...
Panda n Joel fall aslp...
Panda sit infront of miie n Joel...
he lie towards the window n fall aslp while Joel lie on my shoulder and slp...
lucky he's my brother...
if nt is other guy, i'll kill hiimx...
for sure...
but iie keep on distrub hiimx awake also...

NOTICE:HE N MIIE GOT NTH BETWEEN US BESIDE BROTHER N SISTER!

reach hiis room
then all tired liiao...
so all slack there...
on air-con n hx fall aslp while miie n joel sit at different conners...
iie am also way far from Panda alrights...
then blah blah blah...
then went home...
hahas...
nth much...

then went home play games then slp...
tt's all...


21 NOV 2oo7

Today...
acturally wanna go sell he cards...
but Joel n Hui Yi going ice skating today...
aiis...
sad lahhx...
it reminds miie of Wee...
aiis...
any way...
stay home n watch anime...
D.Gray-man...
nt bad...
quite nice...
iie today chiong till episode 13 liiaos...
power bo...
hahas...

Afternoon, Hui Yi called n said she coming to take the card...
then took 5 pack of cards n went off...

then later played TD game and Dota in WAR3 with Panda...
wow...
we can survive in the begaining...
but iie too concentrated in powerful towers tt we lost in the back...
hahas...

after tt watch one epi dehhx D.Grey-man then went to slp...
till Hui Yi wake miie up with a call saying she needs all the cards...
her mom wants it...
so we came around 9plus to pick it up...
then went off...
then later played game with Panda n Joel...
then daddy nag nag nag, say wan use com...
so gib hiimx...
then now he finish using...
so iie blogging...
tt's all...

aiis...
been wonder how's Wee these days...
werid miie...
but still iie made this decision...
iie will nt turn back to hurt hiimx more...
iie dun think iie can even heal those wounds of hiis even if iie go back...
iie can nv be able to counted as someone in hiis life any more...
iie dun tink he can even accept miie if i'm even willing to go back...
oh well...
aiis...
iie hate myself...
now alot of things going through my mind...
iie know iie dun want those things to happen...
but it can't be avoided...
i'm juz one person...
iie cannot be two person at the same time...
i'm not tt kind of idiot also...
hahas...
crazy miie...

i'm so stuck on the song "gotta go my own way"...
iie love the song n iie love the title...
and so...
yeah...
i'm gonna go my own way...
continue to wait for the special someone to come in to my life...
iie hope it'll nt be so soon though...
coz ii'm kinda tired after all this...
so...
for now...
GOOD BYE RELATIONSHIP THINGY!
HELLO SINGLE LIFE! xD

gya na....

*sorry for the boring post, no mood to blog much things*

addictive

back on blogging today...

today got a bit misunderstanding bahhx...
thanks to my stupid brain....
well, let's nt talk about it...

iie find tt saying is easier than doing it...
yeah...
stay as frens...
be frens...
we're juz frens...
but iie clearly know my heart can't do it...
my mind can say "we're juz frens" as much as it wants...
my my heart can't....

alot ppl tell miie he does hab feeling for miie...
even JJ kor...
yeah, becoz of this i'm even more in pain...
because if tt's true, i'm nt the only one in pain...
and if tt's true, then why?...
why is he hiding his feelings?...
why can't we continue to walk though together?...
i promise i'll take wadever that's coming towards us...
i've been holding on so long already....
and sometime iie felt lyk an idiot...
sometime iie feel lyk why am iie the only one trying so hard...
but when was they tell miie come to my mind...
iie wonder....
are you trying as hard?...

joel n iie did talk about it...
maybe it's like wad iie told Panda before we even got so close...
iie remember telling Panda maybe iie won't wanna stead with the one iie love the next time...
as i'm afraid that after steading, things will change...
the closer we get, the more we expect from each other....
blames will become bigger and more sad things will happen due to the expectation...

but...
things aren't as simple as iie think...
the more u love someone, the more euu wanna get hold of it...
the closer euu get the more of it u want it....
it's addictive...
yet poisonous...
it'll hurt u heart and ur mind...
and the person's personality and it's mood....
it'll hurt everything juz like a drug...
it's a drug tt torture ppl but won't realli make ppl die...
only about 10% of the whole world would die of it...
hahas...

miie n my crap...
but somehow...
iie got a strong feeling...
iie dun care if he love miie or only take miie as a sister...
as long iie give it all iie hab...
and as long as i'm still with hiimx...
and as long as we can still be together...
iie will continue loving hiimx...
=)

love sure is dumb...
hahas...

anyways...
my fren Edbert fund a job for US!
yay!
Nokia event dehhx...
meeting on Saturday 6am at Yishun MRT...
by 7.15 must reach Sentosa...
Going to sentosa work one day niia...
$50...
hahas...
still got slot...
anyone wants?...
but must 100% can then comfirm with us uhs...
cannot last min say dun wan...
hahas...
so HAPPY!

and and tml iie meeting HuiYi in the morning to look for jobs...
hahas...
miie despo for $ mahhx...
there's goals iie wanna get...
xD

and after today's War3 game...
he karp my phone not even letting miie say bye after hiimx...
but he did call back!
=) so happy...
plus plus, he ask if wanna go find joel together tml after he's band...
and and, he said he'll be waiting for my call tml...
ahhas...
happy...
small thing but iie get so happy so easily...
miie issh lyk tt dehhx...
cannot help...
x)
loves hiimx...
even though he dun...
xD

aiis...
iie wonder wad will Wee react if he read my blog...
iie hope he dun read it...
iie dun wish for his to get hurt any more...
iie can only hope but iie can't do anything to prevent it...
aiis...

oh well...
hab a nice nice song for euu guys...
ENJOY!

High School Musical2 - Gotta Go My Own Way

Gabriella:
I gotta say what's on my mind
Something about us
doesn't seem right these days
life keeps getting in the way
Whenever we try, somehow the plan
is always rearranged
It's so hard to say
But I've gotta do what's best for me
You'll be ok..
I've got to move on and be who I am
I just don't belong here
I hope you understand
We might find our place in this
world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own way
Don't wanna leave it all behind
But I get my hopes up
and I watch them fall everytime
Another color turns to grey
and it's just too hard to watch it all
slowly fade away
I'm leaving today 'cause I've
gotta do what's best for me
you'll be ok..
I've got to move on and be who I am
I just don't belong here
I hope you understand
We might find our place in this
world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own way

Troy:
What about us?
What about everything we've been through?

Gabriella :
What about trust?

Troy :
You know I never wanted to hurt you

Gabriella :
And what about me?

Troy :
What am I supposed to do?

Gabriella:
I gotta leave but I'll miss you

Troy:
I'll miss you

Gabriella:
So I've got to move on and be who I am

Troy:
Why do you have to go?

Gabriella:
I just don't belong here
I hope you understand

Troy :
I'm trying to understand

Gabriella:
We might find our place
in this world someday
but at least for now

Troy:
I want you to stay

Gabriella:
I wanna go my own way
I've got to move on and be who I am

Troy:
What about us?

Gabriella:
I just don't belong here
I hope you understand

Troy:
I'm trying to understand

Gabriella:
We might find our place in this
world someday
but at least for now
I gotta go my own way
I gotta go my own way
I gotta go my own way

Nighty night!

._Loves You_.

WAH!

i'm so desperately in need of money now
xD
iie spent my last bit of saving today...
treating 4 bowls of udon to my frens today...
well, they did pay some of it...
hahas...
i've been generous these days...
treating them lyk no body's business lyk tt...
iie even help them top up Time-Zone card without them knowing...
xD

how nice...
but it was worth it bahhx...
as long as we can enjoy our time juii hao...
hahas...
but bad thing issh...
iie need a job...
and iie need one NOW!
iie needa work my ass off!
coz there's stuff i've been aiming for n haben get it...
example; iie desperately need a hair cut...
REALLY!

hahas...
and i'm so happy my pimple plantation has stop growing so out of control...
hahas...
yay~
i'm gonna take extra care of it to keep it that way...
and and iie am a gal...
iie wan new clothes~
hahas...
and plus plus, Christmas's coming!!!
=X so dead!

common...
job job fly to miie already!
xD
iie monday meeting HuiYing in da morning to look for some jobs...
iie wonder if we're lucky enough or not....
juz pray!!!
hahas...

i've been thinking alot alot alot these days...
as usual...
i'm so good at thinking about stuff but always end up without answer...
hahas...
iie can't slp at night...
my slping problem became worst day by day....
from lying on my bed for half an hour or so then can fall aslp...
become lying for 3 hrs lyk tt then can finally slp...
hw nice...
this sux...
i'm so bloody tired...
but my mind can't stop thinking...
aiis...

oh well...
and today iie kinda think about miie n panda...
and kinda agreed with being frens are better...
after talking to joel abit...
kinda thought about it and yeap...
it might be better...
hahas...
so iie didn't really regretted choosing to be frens with hiimx after all...
if nt being others will juz be harder for us...

so single iie shall stay...
xD
studies come first...
so Gambatte yo...

argh...
common...
iie wish iie can go juz go find job tml...
hahas...
in fact right now...
iie need it...
so desperately!!!
X_x

iie notice i've change alot since last year...
iie grew!!!
WOOT!
hahas...
oh well....
that's partly a good thing but also a bad thing...
hahas...

iie shall stop my blogging here bahhx...
iie totally hab nth to say...
i'm juz spamming rubbish here euu know...
xD

kays bahhx...
buaiis then...

nighty night!

aiis...

well...
today went out again...
actually meeting joel at school after hiis band...
but woke up late so prepare late...
xD

stayed under my blk around 10 plus as it was heavy rain...
joel whole body wet...
panda a bit niia...

they both play game...
while iie juz sat there do nth...
panda did ask miie to play...
but iie didn't...
i'm alright lyk tt...
at least he show miie he didn't wanna leave miie out...
tt's the important part...
^-^

kay then...
rain keeps getting bigger...
hide at the stair case there but end up running in the rain to 7/11 for mam mam...
joel use my money buy 3 mushroom soup...
how nice of hiimx... =="
but oh well...
i'm not realli mad or smth...
i'm nt that kind of stingy person...
iie dun mind treating frens as long iie hab enough money to spare...
^-^

then drank mushroom soup while standing outside of 7/11...
rain got smaller so we went to bus interchange n took bus to joel's house...
joel went to get change n all...
sat in his stuffy room n see panda play Ps2 while getting torture by hiimx...
slowly got tired n bored so stop laughing...
then hiis tickling doesn't work any more...
then he start wobbling my tummy...
iie keep laughing as it's kinda funny...
perverted guy... xD
nv kick hiim away can liiao...
then after panda finish his game...
he say why iie like kana molest still can laugh untill lyk tt...
iie should defend myself mahhx...
then he show miie hw to defend myself...
he kick kick kick joel so hard untill his leg hit the wall then "zap" the eletrical feeling hurt hiis whole leg...
iie was like "O.o OMG"
then later joel li siiao again then he sayhe teach miie again...
then he kick kick kic...
joel head hit the wall n "bang"...
hahas...
joel can some more say " it was too sudden that iie dun feel any pain..."
"...okay... here's come the pain.... ><"
hahas...
then later again....
kick kick kick...
then hurt his jaw this time...
lolx...
cartoon huh..

but after that...
they got so bored...
that iie become their prey again...
they mess my hair like WTF lyk tt...
=="
then when iie got out of the blanky...
iie was called the lion king...
=="
hw nice of them...
thanks guys...
iie needed that...
=="

then panda keep laughing n laughing...
iie feel enough embarrass already...
so wad's we're fren...
but sometime things juz got too much...
i'm a gal alright...
i'm human too...
iie got pride!....
ii've been giving in alot alreay...
always telling myself they're juz joking...
iie should be so xiao qii...
no one would like it...
even if it was miie who r joking...
iie also won't be able to take ppl who can't stand my joke....
but iie do like my limit...
even though sometime iie got over it once or twice...

but iie dunno if it's miie or wad...
iie got so embaress n a bit hurt that iie use blanky n cover panda face n told hiimx "i hate you!"
=x
i'm truly crazy....
why did iie do that for?...
iie must hab hurt hiimx in some way or other...
he juz stop laughting n said "fine..."

iie dunno narhhx...
somehow iie feels...
aiis...
nvm...

for the time being...
iie shall nt say too much... =]
iie know this is a boring post...
but bare with miie ppl...
for a week or so...
then i'll slowly start to realli blog hw iie feel n wad iie think...
coz as for now...
iie want things to cool down a little...

nighty night ppl...

gya na...

[[_why?...._]]
._iie wish, iie know wad u are thinking_.

its my life

There~
changed my link lurhhx...
took miie a long time to think up a good name...
lolx...
as i'm so loving my old one...
lol...

gonna blog wad happen the past few days...

After SATURDAY's fight...
SUNDAY, iie meet kor in da morning to go Panda house...
kor stayed outside panda house as he didn't dare to go in so he hide at the stairs there...
miie went in then Panda got another laptop from dunno where...
so iie played kudo tag with he n his sis n his sis fren...
while chating about about kor...
wow...
he's realli angry at kor...
then iie told hiimx about sat thingy...
as kor say up to miie on want to say or nt...
while kor told joel nt to say...
lolx...

so joel's HP spoil due to the kick but joel hab to lie to panda as kor say nt to tell panda wad happen...
then when iie told panda about the story, iie totally forgot that he gotta lie about the hp...
so iie was like "uh oh"
so like abit sabo hiimx liiao...
panda was realli angry...
as joel was kinda close to hiimx...
he then ask joel call hiimx and he ask hiimx about his HP...
he kept asking about it but more lies juz keep coming up to cover the old one....
so panda was realli angry n told joel he know wad happen...
and hit the wall so hard iie think his house shake too...
*heart pain*
so he crap the phone and off it...

then went on play kudo thingy and then chat chat chat untill iie told panda about kor outside his house...
then he like abit worry lyk tt went out n look fer hiimx...
he was no where found...
we went up the floors n down the floors looking fer hiimx but he's gone...
so went back to panda house..
then chat chat chat a while...
iie then told panda scaly kor juz went down to buy mam mam eat...
and will come up again later...
then the next thing iie know, panda heard sound outside and look out and ta da~
it's kor kor~
xD
and then kor when *shy shy, scared scared* "er, hi~..."
lolx...
cute siial...
then panda when to his door and then open the door saying "haiix, come in lahhx"
then kor keep saying sorry sorry sorry...
lol...

at that time iie feel as if panda's like the big kor kor around us...
iie wonder why he has such a complex mind...
he see things so deeply n clearly...
aiis....
same birthday as miie but totally different person as miie...
iie hab such a simple mind...
iie do wad iie feel and neber realli think of hw it'll end up ...
ppl say stuff iie all believe...
and feel that iie shouldn't hurt someone so kinda use lies to cover....
but never tot that iie will only hurt ppl more...
aiis... enough of this...

then so panda still fren fren with christ lurhhx lor....
hahas...
but forgib hiimx or nt iie dunno lahhx..
hahas...

then kor left around 6 plus as he needs to go back to hostel...
then iie left around 7.30 or so...
actually dun wan hiis dad send miie home but his dad insisted so okay lurhhx...
then he send miie up till 6 floor then iie say bye bye...
he then called out to miie and ask miie wad iie am doing with noobies that day...
iie told hiimx in a summary form n went off...
he got home dehhx shi hou he ask miie again in msn...
iie explain throughly...

then iie tell hiimx he only put his hand on my head and pray to the Christian god god...
then he say things that got miie abit angry and sad...
so like quarrel liiao...
he even ask miie that iie should go kiss hiimx... =="
it's sad...
it's not like iie like hiimx okay..
it's not like i'm the one budding hiimx...

then end up he say those sad thingy...
and went offline...
iie dunno wad i'm thinking either...
iie juz took my key and my money and ran all da way from my house to hiis house...
marathon man... xD
dunno wad's my point of running when there's phone...
lolx...
but iie juz wanted to see hiimx so badly and tell hiimx wad he think is not true...
he is not such a person he said he was...
so iie ran...
got to hiis house waited for the lift...
but it took so long...
it's like waiting for the tree to grow money like tt...
so iie climb the stairs up instead....
hahas...
then finally got to hiis house but instead of properly explaining, iie cired...
hahas...
crazy miie...

so end up reaching home at 10 plus...
luckily mom not home...

juz now when iie got off the bus...
my leg stuck...
lolx...
pain...
so walk like a kid tt leg got prob dehhx...
plus iie miss my stop too...
x)
hw nice...
so walk kinda far...
and heng heng on the way back saw my chem teacher, Miss Siva...
walking towards my blk too...
so iie tried running abit bit to avoid her...

got home, bath then iie guess a while juii go slp lehhx bahx...

so MONDAY didn't went out...
stayed home play dota with panda n joel...
then joel plan on TUESDAY go watch movie tgt along with panda...
so iie agreed...
tt night joel n miie didn't slp as we worry the next day cannot wake up...
so plan wad to do tml and thingy n talk rubbish...
but at 7am, we still fell aslp...
and iie woke up at 9.30am
iie spam joel's house phone dehhx calls...
but hiis bro answer and iie ask to wake joel up but in the end...
nth comes back to answer the phone...
so iie hang up then went bath n the spam again..
no one answer...
so iie end up calling panda...
and he say he juz woke up...
==" iie shouldn't hab chiong my preparing...
lolx...

so end up meeting at 11.30am...
meet up with them but they juz stood there playing game...
so iie was left out...
yeah...
maybe, infact iie left myself out?...
as iie didn't went n join them see wad they playing...
but that screen is bloodily small...
two head already juz right...
three head iie douth iie can see anything..
and besides...
miie nt realli intrested...
xD

so end up got left out n stood there like an idiot so got a bit pissed...
then went to GV n bought ticket first...
guess they didn't even realize iie walk away either...
then bought the ticket and walk back...
then saw them walking towards miie from Mac there...
so pass them the ticket and they wanna go LJS eat...
so iie went along but didn't eat...
as iie dun eat LJS dehhx...
so fried...
but they juz bought drinks...

then later we went on to time zone play abit...
iie see them play...
the zombie thingy...
then later actually wanted to play air hockey...
but the thingy spoil...
so forget it, we went on to the movies...
then iie bought the nacho combo...
and we shared all of them lurhhx...
joel's pants kinda cheese~ xD
while panda shirt kana n miie issh jacket, hand and legs...
hahas...

after movies, we went to joel house watch horror movie...
dunno issh 28 days or 28 weeks...
lolx...
also zombiie thingy...
eeyer...
bloody...
scary...
iie keep on almost cried but held back...
hahas...

joel should hab tell miie that hiimx n panda already plan lahhx...
then that night iie dun nid waste my time go plan also...
worrying so much...

after that they play game...
iie watch them play...
but joel keep making the game go off by accident...
the result of making ur room so messy...
so they gave up playing PS2...

then joel watch a super super boring plus lame dehhx movie...
so end up everyone got bored and iie became prey...
they keep tickling miie...
iie almost died of laughter...
iie rather nt hab those kind of laughter...
lolx... then later after they got bored of tickling...
they went to mess my hair...
take blanky cover miie and mess my hair by doing the drying hair action...
hw nice....
but iie dun nid that...
my hair issh dry already lahhx...
iie always kana bully by them...
sat in the conner n kana torture...
then BANG goes my head...
iie accidentally hit the wall...

talk about banging my head...
iie think iie hit my head more than 5 times there...
lolx...
first time was freaking painful...
then the rest okay okay...
nt as bad...
lolx
first time is like fight with panda and iie somehow trip n fall backwards and "BANG!"...
imagine how great the pain was...
hahas....

then the day end with miie almost going botak...
as when iie comb...
"TANGLES!!!"
pull..
"OUCH!"
see
"WAD A BIG BUNCH OF HAIR
xD
hahas...

but there's one part where joel trip miie fall so iie was like falling towards the wall with joel falling on top of miie...
lolx...
luckily, panda was sitting near where we falling and save us with his right arm...
if not iie think iie in haven liiao...
but he hurt hiis right arm coz of that...
try habing 100 pound hippopotamus crushing into ur right arm...
pain~

then panda dad came n send us home after wards...
iie was bloodily tired after iie got home...
ahahas...
hw nice...
it help miie slp...
if nt the same words will run through my mind the whole night...

so, TODAY, obviously stayed home...
iie slp from last night 10.30 till today 3.30...
hw nice...
17 to 18 hrs like tt...
sweet~

THE END

so...
that's the end of the broken fairytale story...
it was never meant to exsist anyway...
iie was juz an extral...
that make his lifeworst..
infact...
the evil witch in the story...

anyways...
iie saw a someone add miie in msn recently and in the nick there two names...
Vivian and Zhen Hui iie guess it's no douth any more...
tt he'll be happier without miie...
iie dunno if it's hiimx but wadever...
iie dun care if it's hiimx or nt any more...
it's hiis life any way...
iie shall not bug in and creat8 any more trouble...
iie shall juz get a life...

well iie guess iie do hate myself alot....
iie no longer know who am iie any more....
lolx...
is this the real miie or is that the real miie...
we juz keep growing...
untill now, iie dun get who am iie at all...
lolx...

well...
some ppl say the biggest stranger is urself...
iie guess so...
hahas...

life goes on...
so iie shall walk on...

buaiis...
*sorry for the plain, long and boring post*

[[_it's my life_]]

good bye are forever

lies lies lies...
tt's all the thing iie hab in my head...

first...
that day the fight happen becoz of lies...
then now...
aiis...

well, white lies is still lies right...
so no point naming lies as white lies...
it doesn't change anything...

yesterday alot happen...
but iie shall blog it tommorow...
or smth...
i'm gonna change my link later...

aiis...
duii bu qii Wee...
iie forgotten iie shouldn't tell euu those..
as it would only bring more pain...
but it would also make euu hate miie...
so tt's da gd part right?...
atleast hating someone make euu forget them more easily...
oh well...
take care uhs...

iie shall not complain or say anything untill iie change the link...
so this is where iie should stop...

gya na...

enough...

well...
actually iie had made my decision long ago...
but wasn't able to confirm it...
but since someone help miie choose it...
iie shall continue with wad he chosen...
so...
iie would be with none of them...
this should be a good thing...


iie wouldn't need to hurt wee any more...
no more...
iie had enough hurting hiimx that iie started hating myself...
Wee i'm sorry...
iie promised wee iie will remember hiimx...
and that will be most precious promise iie made...
and iie will keep it true...
and iie also swear to hiimx...
that our love was always true...
iie truly loved hiimx...
realli...


people who hate miie would probably scold miie bitch for leaving Wee but still say this kind of stuff...
i'm sorry to made euu all angry...
but iie would not gib a dam about wad euu all say...
becoz...
iie mean wad iie say...
iie seriously mean it...


well, i'm starting to miss hiimx...
realli...
but this was the decision iie made...
so...
iie shall not turn back...
even if iie regretted...


aiis...
iie would change my blog link soon...
sorry...
becoz iie dun hope Wee to read my blog any more...
becoz...
iie know reading this will only make hiimx even more sad...
who ever out there that love hiimx...
please help miie take care of hiimx...
help miie heal his wounds...
help miie make hiimx happy again...
iie do hope he will be the cheery hiimx...
iie love hiis cheeryness...
so please, help miie keep his cheeryself...


since 8 Nov 2oo7,
alot has happen....
decision made...
new frens...
bonds broken...
aiis...
alot...

let's talk about today....
christ kor has a close fren name kenneth...
they've been close fren for two years...
then ytd and today...
becoz of miie...
he keep lying to kor...
iie dunno why either...
he lie to hiimx that he go ah ma house when he's acturally going out with miie...

ytd,
becoz iie was realli sad on smth...
so he n kor actually wanna meet miie to cheer miie up...
but well, iie overslept...
but kenneth wanna meet again later on ...
so well iie agreed...
iie ask hiimx where kor he say dunno...
but the next day kor tell miie he got tell hiimx where he go and can call wad number to find hiimx...
he lied...
but he was realli nice to miie that day...
he brought miie to the movies, to time zone bought two bears for miie and ask to take neo print...
he everything also pay till he poke liiao...
aiis...

then the next day[today]
he meet miie at da eveing to go hiis house fer dinner as his maid will cook and his siblings will be home but he told kor that he going ah ma house...
when iie got in contact with kor, he told miie tt kenneth told hiimx he going ah ma house...
so we smell smth fishy liiao...
so they say they will see wad happen lurhhx...
so they somehow followed us...
lolx...


in the end kor caught hiimx red handed outside hiis house...
kor was furious lurhhx...
he keep asking "why euu lie to miie?!?!?!"
but kenneth keep saying "wad euu wan now?!?!?!"
then kor will reply "NO! now iie asking euu, why euu lie to miie?!?!?"
then kenneth will say "iie know! but now iie asking euu wad euu want now?!?!"
he juz dun want reply...
=="
then in the end they went to the stairs there ask ask ask but nth come out...
kor was angry so walk away...
then we[miie, joel, christ] going into the lift then kenneth suddenly pull hiimx by his shirt when the door is closing...
pull hiimx out n whack hiimx...
iie dunno wad i'm thinking then but iie went up and ask them to stop and protected kor from two punches...
hahas...
three years of bring Gans so we kinda close lurhhx bahhx iie think...

iie got two punch then felt dizzy, sat on the floor scream "BU YA DA LE LAHHX!" and cried uncontrollably ...
iie was... terrify...
but after he hit miie...
he didn't stop...
he keep wacking kor...
joel kept trying to keep miie going into the fight...
he know miie well that iie would juz bug in...
but he fail to hold miie back...
but when iie sat down n cry, he drag miie abit away from the fight...
kor stop fighting back and juz sat there looking at miie cry while getting kick...
untill kenneth ah gong come out to protect us...
his ah gong actually wanted to fight with kenneth...
thanks hiimx alot...
so after that iie got drag back into the lift, shivering...
and went down...
then saw a cute doggy that immediately brighten mii8e up abit...
kawaii desu nehhx...


iie was realli scared that iie was shivering...
it was the first time iie got hit so hard by a guy...
it was the first time this happen to someone close to miie...
iie was realli scared...

then later we sat bus back to NP then we go there walk walk n cool down...
ate sushi...
drink slurpy...
then sat down at a blk n talk about stuff...
keep habing terribal headach for about an hour or two...
then later hand cannot lift up at the neck to the shoulders there hurt...
iie dunno where he hit miie....
hahas...

but now no pain, no nth now le lehhx...
lolx...
powerfull back iie got...
xD

then later 10pm plus go home lurhhx...
but go up to 6th floor then notice kenneth was waiting for miie at that floor...
iie was shock but iie took a few steps backward when iie saw hiimx...
iie am scared of hiimx already...
he walk towards miie and held my left hand...
iie walk backwards again...
he ask if iie was okay...
and if kor's okay...
he said he didn't know he hit miie untill his di tell hiimx...
coz his di was there too...
he didn't know wad he was doing...
he gib miie two punches still can dunno???
O.o
funny...
then iie coldly reply hiimx iie was alright and all...

iie seriously only took hiimx as fren...
he ask miie for stead a few times already..
but iie rejected...
iie told hiimx iie dun love hiimx
iie told hiimx dun wait for miie becoz iie know iie will not love hiimx even in the future...
but he keep asking miie...
aiis...

and for some reason...
he remind miie of my sad past and made miie keep crying....
why he always manage to make miie cry so easily lahhx...
iie wasn't crying fer hiimx...
iie was crying for my past and myself...
he was using hiis words to gan dong wo...
but sadly...
he remind miie of my past and iie could only cry...
iie hate this...

aiis...

so end up...
iie 'so call' kap hiis phone...


iie juz hope...
iie dun nid to see hiimx any more...
i'm kinda scared of hiimx..

well, kor also hab a bit misunderstanding with Panda...
they've been 8 years of frenship lurhh...
so long...
envy them...
but they sure went though alot...
hope the misunderstanding will clear up soon...


aiis..
well...
i'm badly hurt by Panda...
habing sleepless night becoz of hiimx...
and now...
iie can't even slp at all after wad miie joel n kor discuss today...
aiis...
let miie die man..



*HATE vs LOVE*

iie hate euu
iie love euu

._WoHuiJianQiangDehhx_.

[[_will be juz myself from now on_]]
no more trying to change...

no one deserve pain

everyone has a dream personality....
they would want to be someone else instead of themself....
even if it's juz a little changes...
some wanna be popular, some wants to be strong, some wanna be weak so that they could be protected...
while some juz wanna be normal...
short ones wish to be tall...
tall ones wanna be short....
chio ones wanna be cute....
cute one hope to be chio...

as for miie...
iie wanna be someone that everyone can accept and feels happy around miie...
someone kind and understandable...
but now it seems so far away...
iie am now being totally opposite of wad iie will be...
making two people around miie sad....


this world sure is imperfect...
imperfect human plus imperfect world...
wad a match...


iie neber thought i'll be in this kind of position...
playing the evil role...


no matter wad iie do...
iie will hurt them....
even if iie choose to let go of both of them...
in the end, it makes no different...
and iie will still needa choose...
no matter hw much iie dun wann hurt them...
i'll still end up hurting them....
why is this world so un fair...


iie juz want one person...
juz one person for miie to love...
for miie to treasure...
for miie to love hiimx with my whole heart...
but why did two came in my life....
iie dun like being the one to choose...
aiis....


no one deserve being hurt....
no one deserve being punish for following wad their hearts feels...
no one did anything wrong to deserve this kind of punishment...
no one....

aiis....
will my heart guide miie through...
iie wonder...
let's end it here...



today afternoon slp alot...
as last night didn't get must proper rest....
at night went out to hab dinner...
then back home rest a while...
Cp then msn miie that her maple wedding day will change to tonight...
my surprises aren't done yet...
so iie chiong realli hard...
but left two lvls juii can realli gib her surprise lurhhx...
aiis...
bought her wedding dress + crown and her dar dehhx wedding shirt n shoe...
but didn't manage to get in time for the wedding...
was late by a min...
siianz...
oh well...
ZuTaMenYongYuanXingFu...

end....


[[_searching for you_]]
._ReachingOut_.

bottle up mt feelings... and one day u will see no more of miie...

fck fck fck fck fck!
iie write such a long thing n my com close it all up...
my feelings..
the things iie realli wanna say...
forget it...
i'm not gonna slp tonight...

I'M NOT GONNA SLP...
iie can't express myself...
iie everything that iie express...
my com bloodily close it up...
iie feel lyk crying now...

aiis...
iie wanna die...
now...
stright away...

someone...
save miie...

kill miie please...
someone kill miiie....
iie dun wanna live any more lahhx...
i'm so tired...
so tired...
iie hab enough lehhx....
iie dun want any more of this....
end my life please.....

all messed up

blogging again....
aiis...
iie feel so down now...
iie had neber had such complicated thingy before...
neber hab iie tot...
this would happen to miie...
iie tot all this will only happen in drama....
but now...
it's in my life...
two guys...
plus miie...
i'm a dramatic person...
but wad's with the dramatic life lahhx...
both my ex...
both the one that iie had truly loved once...
the only two that iie had truly loved...
both of them totally opposite personality...



iie am thinking of preparing a letter...
for both of them...
writing down my feelings...
haiiz...
but who shall iie end up with?...
iie must choose...
no matter wad iie do, iie must choose...
iie tried gibing up both...
but nth seems to change.....
so end up...
iie hab to choose...



but one thing they are in common....
both a joker...
hahas...
both shorter than miie when we first met...
both shy when we first met...
hahas...
both dehhx first impression gib miie issh...
"kawaii & kind"
hahas...

iie...
realli love them...

panda...
chocolate...



aiis....
how can iie say iie love them when iie fcking hurt their hearts?
shine! [jap dehhx "die"]

aiis...

Dear Lord ,

Pls Help Miie Not To Hurt The Ppl Around Miie .
Pls Gib Miie Wisdom To Solve All The Problems I Have.
Pls Gib Miie Wisdom To Chose The Wise One .
I Need Ur Help .

In Jesus's Name I Pray , Amen.

a fren taught miie this...
hahas...

thanks wor, little star...^-^

hahas...
gonna become christian huh miie?...
hahas
oh ya!

panda n chocolate...
both different religion too~
hahas...

humm...
iie feel that Christian ppl are rather more kind n frenly though....
talk about gentle...
while chiness god dehhx more playful but emo...
hahas...

aiis...
iie shall go emo at the conner...
hahas...
just kidding...
tt won't help abit at all...

i've been thinking alot lurhhx....
alot alot...
but nth came up...
pea brain!
x(

so fck up with my life lahhx...

so many feelings...
iie wanna blog up...
but if iie do...
ppl will tink that i'm a slut or bitch dehhx...
so forget it...

someone save miie man...
iie can't let go nor can iie hold oh tight...
they're all...
aiis...

shit miie bloody idiot!...
why miie why miie why miie...
iie juz want a simple love...
juz one issh enough...
iie juz wanna be love by one...
iie juz want to love one person n get on with my life with hiimx...
but why two appear?...

aiis...
iie can't say no one understand how iie feel now...
as in this world...
not only miie hab this kind of prob...
not only miie handle this kind of thing so lousily...
but, i'm in a situation that some can't realli understand how bad i'm feeling already...

aiis....

i'm not ready...
for such a mess...
iie dun like this mess...
iie dun want this mess....

save miie....


who is the one that would be with miie till the end of time?...



[[_cry baby cries no more_]]



._let miie fade away_.

headach

haiiz...
wee n miie talk about stuff ytd...
haiiz...
somehow iie geting clearer n clearer view of the stuff...
maybe iie juz need abit more time to realli sort things out...
but the more time iie drag, the more hurt it'll become...
but wad can iie do...
haiiz...
iie kinda hab the view of how it'll end up to...
but how can iie proceed to end it up like tt?...
wad should iie do to prevent stuff n make things less painfull...
haiiz...
such a triangle thingy...
iie neber came across before...
all i've even seen it is in drama...
but why my life hab to hab such a thing happening...
it's juz so complected....
please god...
guide miie...
save miie...

my sis has been working in a maid cafe at city hell...
CosCafe...
she's dress up like the Japanese maid...
LOOK!

first day dehhx uniform





2nd day...








3th day






and these is all of them there...
WOOT! CHIO BU!

that's all



TML going out with Wee...
Friday issh book by Wee...
iie wonder when can iie stop hurting hiimx...
iie asked hiimx to leave miie...
if not i'll hurt hiimx more...
but he said he didn't mind...
zhen shi ke da sah gua...
aiiz....