Gibing Up

Today iie didn't manage to wake up to go to school...
haiiz...
alot happen...
iie would wish to write it in...
but...
iie couldn't...
guess this secrets are better off kept secrets...

Haiiz...
iie wouldn't neber be able to reach Chen Wee any more...
Juz like how that someone will never be able to reach miie...
It hurts...
haiiz...
sorry that someone who i've hurt...
guess iie realli deserve it this time...
Cp n CC...
u both might say bf next time still can find again de..
iie totally agree with tt...
but iie dunno why...
wad ever iie do it seems like this feeling juz keeps hunting miie...
i had neber love someone this much before...
why am iie so silly...
why didn't iie treasure it untill iie lost it...
iie realli deserve it...
dun iie?....
i'm dying soon...
maybe already rotting...
or decomposing...
haiiz...
iie dunno wad to do narz...
becoz of miie iie had hurt so many ppl in da process...
and making their life so miserable...
wad should iie do now...
no matte wad method iie try, it juz keep coming back!
WHO IN DA HELL CAN UNDERSTAND HOW THIS FEELS?!?!?!
some maybe dose...
but if there is?...
can they plz help miie...
iie dun wanna remember...
can iie juz go out to da road and get bang by a car now?
maybe that can help miie forget...
iie do deserve this suffering...
but iie can no longer take it any more...
plz end my life now...
even now as i'm writing this...
i'm holding back my tears....
holding back tears are so uncomfortable...
my heart feels like it's frozening...
iie gotta set myself free...
yeah...
but how in da hell can iie set my feelings free?...
da feelings juz can't get lost...
help miie lahx... plz....

u all might read my entry le either say iie silly, stupid or u'll juz hate miie...
where iie know some ppl out there does...
if u wanna hate miie...
hate miie bahx...
iie can't do anything either...
coz iie hab no rites to ask any one to be in my shoe
or at my point of view and understand my situation any more
or even forgive miie....
as iie did not try understanding his feelings and stand at his point of view in da begaining...

my time has realli stops in April...
iie had realli lost myself there...
iie lost my heart along with it...
that's why...
it feels so empty inside there...
and that's why it hurts so much inside there...
that's why it's frozen inside there...

sorry everyone...
to bother u all...
to always talking rubbish...

and if some of u want miie to go find counselor and talk about these...
then it's...
IMPOSSIBLE...
i will never tell this to da counselor...
coz it's a bewi long story with HIDDEN SECRETS...
iie hate myself to da core...
iie feel like dying...
this might sound stupid n silly...
but try being miie...
and u'll know why...
iie agree it IS stupid n silly...
but iie dunno wad iie can do any more...

sorry Mr Koh...
u might think this is stupid n silly too...
but as iie say try being miie...
u dun nid to talk to miie or send miie any comments any more...
coz i already know wad u'll be saying...
and iie can tell u...
that dose not help any more...

i'll try to bare with it...
but plz...
dun blame miie if iie could not hold on long enough...

coz iie hab enough le...
iie realli dunno how long iie can bare with it le...
pray for miie then....



[dun worry this is nt my hand]


DeadCorpse