7 July 92, Monday [youth day]

when i woke up in the morning, iie tot it's gonna be another boring day.
iie tot iie would only have a simple lunch at SAKAE and tt's it.
but iie was totally surprise by XiaoWen n PohLing.
They bought cake and came my house an celebrate with miie.
Was dam touch.
am realli happy but iie didn't know how to show it.

After that, around 4pm PohLing went to meet her Boii Boii.
So left miie n XiaoWen.
Then she using my com dehhx shi hou, iie go bath and prepare.
After that miie, Mom and XiaoWen went to hab SAKAE sushi.
Mom treat XiaoWen eat too. (=
XiaoWen say she likes my mom.
She feels that my mom is like her mom and we were like a family.

After that iie da bao a ChaSoba, and strawberry ice-cream and mushii ice cream.
Exchange the Ice-cream with Xiao wen and iie brought along the present iie wanna gib Hx.
So after that mom went home first and then iie went on to Hx house.
Gave hiimx and was about to go when Hx asked us to stay for a while.
So we stayed.
Chat with XiaoWen but sat way far from Hx.
lols.

His mom chat with miie.
Asked miie why iie so long never come.
iie explain tt night why iie ran away.
and explain tt we break and told her we break because of misunderstandings.
iie also told her tt the misunderstanding is from my ex.
and told her tt iie still realli love Hx.
Then she ask miie gt time come back more.
Then iie reply iie might nt be able to, iie scared iie bother hx too much.
Then she say "dun wanna see aunty le ar?"
then iie reply "ofcause not, i'll miss you dehhx, iie only scared iie bother hx too much."

After that sat down in the room again n chat with XiaoWen.
Then heard hx say he headache as he drank quite alot of vodka.
Then iie dunno his house got tea or not.
So iie end up only can get hiimx a cup of water.
he said he drink alot le then iie still gib hiimx water.
so iie kept quiet.
then his sis ask him just drink.
so he drank then iie told hiimx iie dunno what else iie could get hiimx, so got water instead.
after that we sat down somewhere beside hiim but nt too near n chat as his sis went to see super band.
then he told us that his mom wan us to stay to celebrate his bday tgt.
so we agreed.

then he said Jj coming.
so we offered to follow.
Then he ran down the stairs dam fast.
it remind miie of tt day, 8JUNE...
so iie end up trying to run as fast to catch up.
XiaoWen was way behind.
forgot my shoe can't run tt fast dehhx.
end up leg darn pain, but iie bare the pain n continue to walk on to catch up.
but in the end iie stop to wait for XiaoWen.
iie can't just PS here behind.
She is an important fren too. (=

So end up she wanna stay behind at the bus stop as XiaoWen say she can't catch up on hong xian so lazy to go.
iie can't just PS her there so iie stayed back with her.
4 bus gone le then their bus come.

so went up back to his house.
then celebrate his bday.
after that ate cake le then chat alot.
then dunno why they chat about Ampit hair then iie was drinking water & the left over cake is infront of miie.
then iie go "BUUUUU" the lemon tea came out.
and i think kana the cake too.
lolx.
evetyone laught lyk hell, and as usual, becoz of my dumbness, i became a clown. (=
but everyone enjoyed themself, tt's the important thing.
anyway...
sorry sorry!

after that 11am then we walk XiaoWen home then took 804 to my home.
Jj send miie home.
Thanks wor.
then chat with hiimx a little on the bus.
then gt home 12am plus le.
Chiong abit of my project then go sleep le.
but lay on bed till 3 plus going 4am then sleep.
super tired but lie dun juii cannot sleep le.
mind always seems populated by hiimx.
then last night cry on bed.
because...
WAS HAPPY TO BE ABLE TO CHAT WITH HIIMX SO MUCH TODAY.
am REALLY happy. (=



8 July 2008, Tuesday

Today didn't manage to wake up for school.
Am sorry...
then 10plus wake up chiong my project all finish!
woot!
then 12.30 bath n all the chiong down to school to take my N level oral.
Dam nervous for the first time.
iie was the 2nd candidate.
then the examiner dam nice n young narhhx (=

Thanks CP, HUIYING,HUIYI AND DONG WEN fer ya present!
luv ya all.

after oral, chat with Musfirah about Hx as she asked miie about it.
then iie talk talk talk then past by the library and saw Hx n joe.
Hx saw miie but joe back face miie.
actually wanna scared joe but dunno how joe notice iie was walking towards hiimx.
then went to find CP n CC for my stuff then went to find XiaoWen n PohLi.
dam bored and humid sitting there in front of the hockey court.
all my brain could think of is Hx.
then iie told XiaoWen and PohLi that iie wanna try my best for da last time.
if iie still can't change anything and totally lost hiimx.
iie will go cut my hair short n become a butch. (=
SERIOUSLY!

everyone knows iie treasure and love my beauty the best.
iie try my best and try everything just to become pretty.
but iie am willing to gib up being a gurl just becoz of hiimx.
funny?... weird?...
iie dunno...
if iie can't win him back by hard work.
iie wanna become boi.
iie dun wanna stay as a gurl anymore.
just by the thought that iie am a gurl and iie love that boi.
HURTS.
so maybe changing into a butch might help miie a little from the pain (=

today mom finally notice the name carved on my arm.
she gt a lit bit angry.
but she still bought a new HP for miie.
C902 sonny erricson.
Cost her $300++
Ytd night she still iron my uniform for miie too.
AM HAPPY.

besides love, my family n fren are my other supports.
all my family n frens power is add up tgt and equal to the power of LOVE.
in my heart lahhs.
xD
So they are all important!

Hx, if u're reading this, iie wanna tell euu...
iloveyou.
and tt's a fact tt will never change in my heart.
iie will try my best to love you for the last time.
please don't gib up on us yet.
unless, you really 'bian xing' le then tell miie to stop.
alrights?

[[_iloveyou_]]

._I'llJiaYouFerDaLastTime_.

[[_Just Fer Euu_]]